yesiknow (yesiknow) wrote in starvinglips,

things that make me happy no matter what

-The moment at night when, after cleaning my room and washing my bedding and taking a warm shower and softly putting on jazz/Interpol/other, I slip between the folded-down cotton sheets, sigh, and think, "GOD this is the best thing ever." It's like an orgasm.
-Newport. Like the day Josie and I were trying to find lunch, but first we stopped at Nye Beach and had a cigarette over the cable fence. It was early winter and cool and clear and sunny, some kid was feeding bread to the seagulls, and we could see the lighthouse. If I had nothing but that as my life, I can't tell you I'd be unfulfilled.
-Feeling something softly accidentally brush against my skin, fingertips, someone else's hair or sleeve or lips...and especially when they give you a smile that says "sorry" but means "I liked it, too."
-Dancing alone in my room in my underwear and laughing because it's one of those times that I just adore myself, and I'm wearing stockings.
-Laughing with a group of people. It's all I ever want to do, ever.
-Going to old places like cemeteries, Old Town, or Prague and phasing out anything modern so I can pretend I'm back in a different era just for a few seconds.
-Vintage clothing.
-Planning my own gravesite.
-Reading poetry alone on a public bench on a sunny day.
-Hearing what people say about me.
-Finding out that someone has been notably and positively affected by me.
-Ladylike lunches with Josie, like sandwiches and coffee at Canyon Way when we got our whipped cream on the side and ate it with our spoons, and then bought a number of very elegant things like the little mint cases.
-Summer and everything about it, because even when you're bored, it's summer. Like eating after school at Sada's with a bunch of people near the end of high school last year, and going to the river with Sarah and Josie, and driving through Logsden with the sun so hot that the air coursing through the windows burned our cheeks.
-When colors look so surreal that it's like a movie filter, like those yellow days in Logsden or that ashy stone day at the cemetery, or the overwhelming green of a Northwestern forest, or a perfectly lighted cafe.
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